How many times do we hear about people meaning to help but getting it all wrong? How many times do people complain of smug, self righteous people who have no idea of other people’s predicament taking an unwarranted moral high ground?
I am of the opinion that most of us are still eager to help our neighbour (contrary to public opinion) but somewhere between the thought and the action, we get things incredibly messed up. We often forget that we are not the star of the show and get carried away in a sense of good-doing and forget that without the people we are trying to help understanding what we are trying to do, we might as well keep our goodwill to ourselves.
The image of a hairdresser (or barber) springs to mind. Imagine you hadn’t had your hair done for a while or never even had your hair done before and all of a sudden find yourself under the armpit of the hairdresser. Yes, your hair might need some work but to hold you down against your will and apply methods that might seem a bit extreme for an outcome that you are not so sure of will not look like an inviting idea. In the same way, just because someone you happen to come across seems to be in need of help doesn’t give you the right to “help” them. I am not for one second saying that we should pass up an opportunity to help. What I am saying is that you don’t dive in at the deep end at your first time in the pool. You get familiar with the waters before you proceed to the tricky parts. I believe nothing in life should be rushed or rushed into. But you find that most people don’t even know their neighbour’s names or their children’s name or any of the softer details of their life and think they can just jump and play saviour.
In cases where I have been guilty of the issue in question, it has often been because I was in too much of a hurry to get the job done, add that notch to my belt, pull out the cape and soak up the applause. We are too often so caught up in ourselves that we forget that the problem we are trying to help with has very little, if anything, to do with us. We often help out expecting to be praised or rewarded for our efforts. We often give waiting and expecting to get some back in return. But I’d like to propose a different attitude – DO THE RIGHT THING BECAUSE IT’S THE RIGHT THING TO DO. It might sound like something you expect to hear in a Sunday school class but that doesn’t stop it from being true. If we do good expecting people to do the same to us, then what credits do we expect? Don’t even the most evil of men do the same? We have to cultivate the habit of doing the right thing without any thought for who is looking on and who might pat us on the back at the end .
One of our greatest responsibilities is to love anyone that needs our love in the way we would expected to be love. In other words, do to others what you would like them to do to you. If you find your neighbour in hard times and feel like helping, put yourself their shoes and try for a second and think of the best way you would like to be approached and offered help if you were in a similar situation. You must never lose sight of the fact that you are not the main attraction in that episode and that at the end of it all, no fingers should be pointing in your direction
In today’s world where people are obsessed with stardom and fame, it is no surprise that many often hesitate to get involved in anything that doesn’t seem to have any reward in sight. People are more concerned about looking good rather than being good. And more worryingly, we are starting to accept this as the norm. So much that if one person should “do the right thing because it’s the right thing to do”, it feels like they are doing something out of the ordinary. We need to bang the drums of change and determine in our hearts and minds that we will do the right thing regardless of public opinion, regardless of reward or ridicule and regardless of how far out of our comfort zone it may take us. SELAH
The Telligent Blog ©
Saturday, 13 February 2010
Monday, 1 February 2010
Saturday, 5 December 2009
Common Sense
The saying goes that there is no such thing as common sense and that if there was, it's not very common. But do we ever stop to think why that is? Is it fair to say that as a result of the earth being populated by almost 7 billion human beings, it will be near impossible for a majority of that 7 billion to share common reasoning(s)? Do we ever stop to think what common actually means or what sense is?
For the sake of this piece, I have chosen the definition of common that calls it anything that is found in large numbers, found often or something that is shared among a decent amount of people. I have also chosen the definition of sense that calls it an awareness or realisation of something. As a result of this two definitions, I choose to define common sense as an awareness and/or realisation that is shared or found often among a decent enough amount of people. And if you choose to define common sense this way, I don't think it will be difficult to say that common sense is not the myth it is often said to be
In years gone by, perhaps due to limited outside influence and years of doing things the same way, it was very easy to establish and maintain a status quo. But since the dawn of what many refer to as the global age, the intermingling of peoples has opened many eyes to the many other options that existed to the way they had previously operated. As a result, many methods and patterns that had previously been deemed infallible have been questioned and sometimes even shelved but that has signalled the end of common beliefs and ideologies. Many of the old beliefs and ideologies still hold common water e.g respect for elders, many common courtesies etc. And at the same timr, many new ideologies have been welcomed be the majority e.g Fair Trade, Liberalism etc
One thing that we often fail to realise or ignore to acknowledge is that what is often deemed common sense is not necessarily always the right option. For example, in the 19th century, it was common sense that blood-letting (the withdrawal of often considerable quantities of blood from a patient) was the best way to cure or prevent illness and disease but we know better today. In the same way, we believe today that by switching off our lights, driving less and living “greener” lives, we will in one way or another slow down global warming and save the earth from what seems like imminent destruction when historical evidence shows that the same thing we are trying to stop has happened in the past without any human help or assistance.
It is not difficult to see that if a good enough number of people of a sufficient amount of influence come out and speak for or against the existence or non-existence of a thought or a pattern among people, achieving a common sense will be less of a challenge it is proving to be at the moment.
By this reason, I humbly submit that common sense does exist and is not as impossible as often said. All that is needed is a reason plausible enough and a voice loud enough and it will only be a matter of time before a decent enough amount of people will be on the band wagon and a new common sense would have been created
If everyone comprehended at the same level, all sense will be common. - Pete Rock
For the sake of this piece, I have chosen the definition of common that calls it anything that is found in large numbers, found often or something that is shared among a decent amount of people. I have also chosen the definition of sense that calls it an awareness or realisation of something. As a result of this two definitions, I choose to define common sense as an awareness and/or realisation that is shared or found often among a decent enough amount of people. And if you choose to define common sense this way, I don't think it will be difficult to say that common sense is not the myth it is often said to be
In years gone by, perhaps due to limited outside influence and years of doing things the same way, it was very easy to establish and maintain a status quo. But since the dawn of what many refer to as the global age, the intermingling of peoples has opened many eyes to the many other options that existed to the way they had previously operated. As a result, many methods and patterns that had previously been deemed infallible have been questioned and sometimes even shelved but that has signalled the end of common beliefs and ideologies. Many of the old beliefs and ideologies still hold common water e.g respect for elders, many common courtesies etc. And at the same timr, many new ideologies have been welcomed be the majority e.g Fair Trade, Liberalism etc
One thing that we often fail to realise or ignore to acknowledge is that what is often deemed common sense is not necessarily always the right option. For example, in the 19th century, it was common sense that blood-letting (the withdrawal of often considerable quantities of blood from a patient) was the best way to cure or prevent illness and disease but we know better today. In the same way, we believe today that by switching off our lights, driving less and living “greener” lives, we will in one way or another slow down global warming and save the earth from what seems like imminent destruction when historical evidence shows that the same thing we are trying to stop has happened in the past without any human help or assistance.
It is not difficult to see that if a good enough number of people of a sufficient amount of influence come out and speak for or against the existence or non-existence of a thought or a pattern among people, achieving a common sense will be less of a challenge it is proving to be at the moment.
By this reason, I humbly submit that common sense does exist and is not as impossible as often said. All that is needed is a reason plausible enough and a voice loud enough and it will only be a matter of time before a decent enough amount of people will be on the band wagon and a new common sense would have been created
If everyone comprehended at the same level, all sense will be common. - Pete Rock
Monday, 23 November 2009
The Highest Point of Satisfaction is when Justice is Done
The highest point of satisfaction is when justice is done. But when I say justice, I dont mean justice in terms of a sentence, a verdict or a punishment. I mean justice in the sense of doing justice to that innate ability that lies in all humans to go beyond their mortal state and defy the boundaries of what had previously been defined as the limit to pursue, overtake and recover new territory. That ability to take hand and leg movements and turn them in to the most awesome and awe inspiring dance and dance moves. To take a few leaves, some oil and some other things that might have previously been deemed of very little use and turn it into the most mouth watering of delicacies. That ability to give life through mere words
It is in realising and understanding this ability/abilities that the champion is revealed. And it is that realisation and understanding or failure to realise and understand that does the proverbial sorting of men from boys. It is also very important to note that the champion is not the one who didn't get knocked down, but the one who didn't get knocked out. And the winner is not the one who never lost but the one who never knew when he had lost. And in similar fashion, a success is a situation where the protagonist failed to resign to a failure but understands that for as long as we occupy this mortal state, and bound to suffer some setbacks. It is in the knowledge of this and the acting out of the same that we find and fulfil our purpose in life. It is in realising that we might fall, we might fail and we might falter but we must dust ourselves down and keep on keeping on until we reach that goal we set out to achieve that we find that ultimate satisfaction
Saturday, 7 November 2009
Where is God at the LHC?
CERN's efforts to recreate the beginning of the big bang is not all about science. There are theological questions too
The simple theological answer is “Everywhere”, as the Creator of a world that contains particle physicists, CERN, and even Higgs bosons (if such there be). But what could persuade us that the Universe is indeed a divine creation? It is certainly not full of items stamped “Made by God”, for the Creator is more subtle than that. Yet science has some things to show us that encourage one to look deeper into the question of God’s existence.
First, however, we must dispose of an approach that would be mistaken, both scientifically and theologically. When the LHC was switched on in a blaze of glory, sadly only to be disabled temporarily a few days later by a different kind of blaze, there was much media hype that this new machine would enable us to look back to the big bang itself.
Scientifically, this was a foolish claim. Certainly the LHC will tell us things of great interest about physics at energies much higher than those hitherto explored, but they still fall far below the level of energies present immediately after the big bang.
Even if this had not been the case, the big bang is not all that interesting theologically. To believe in a Creator is not to answer the question of who lit the initial touch paper, but to address the much deeper question of why there is something rather than nothing. God is as much the Creator today as God was 13.7 billion years ago, for the Creator’s role is to ordain the order of this remarkable world and to continually maintain it in being.
To search for hints of a Creator, therefore, is to look to see if there might be signs of a divine Mind behind the order of the Universe. The best question to ask is: why is science possible at all, in the deep way that the LHC is seeking to exploit? Of course, we have to be able to make sense of the everyday world in order to survive in it, but why can we penetrate the secrets of the strange, counterintuitive quantum world of the LHC, with its possible Higgs bosons and supersymmetric particles? Why is the Universe so rationally transparent to our inquiry, and why is that abstract subject mathematics the key to unlocking its secrets?
Time and again physics has been found to be expressed in equations possessing the unmistakable character of mathematical beauty, so that pursuit of this beauty has been an actual technique in formulating the theories that the LHC will test. The Universe is rationally beautiful and rewards its explorers with the gift of wonder. Science exploits this fact but it does not explain it. Is it all just our luck, or is it a sign that a divine Mind does indeed lie behind cosmic order?
I believe that science is possible because the Universe is a creation and that we, to use an ancient phrase, are creatures made in the image of our Creator. That’s where God is at the LHC, as the producer of the show.
The Rev Canon John Polkinghorne, KBE, FRS, was Professor of Mathematical Physics at the University of Cambridge
The simple theological answer is “Everywhere”, as the Creator of a world that contains particle physicists, CERN, and even Higgs bosons (if such there be). But what could persuade us that the Universe is indeed a divine creation? It is certainly not full of items stamped “Made by God”, for the Creator is more subtle than that. Yet science has some things to show us that encourage one to look deeper into the question of God’s existence.
First, however, we must dispose of an approach that would be mistaken, both scientifically and theologically. When the LHC was switched on in a blaze of glory, sadly only to be disabled temporarily a few days later by a different kind of blaze, there was much media hype that this new machine would enable us to look back to the big bang itself.
Scientifically, this was a foolish claim. Certainly the LHC will tell us things of great interest about physics at energies much higher than those hitherto explored, but they still fall far below the level of energies present immediately after the big bang.
Even if this had not been the case, the big bang is not all that interesting theologically. To believe in a Creator is not to answer the question of who lit the initial touch paper, but to address the much deeper question of why there is something rather than nothing. God is as much the Creator today as God was 13.7 billion years ago, for the Creator’s role is to ordain the order of this remarkable world and to continually maintain it in being.
To search for hints of a Creator, therefore, is to look to see if there might be signs of a divine Mind behind the order of the Universe. The best question to ask is: why is science possible at all, in the deep way that the LHC is seeking to exploit? Of course, we have to be able to make sense of the everyday world in order to survive in it, but why can we penetrate the secrets of the strange, counterintuitive quantum world of the LHC, with its possible Higgs bosons and supersymmetric particles? Why is the Universe so rationally transparent to our inquiry, and why is that abstract subject mathematics the key to unlocking its secrets?
Time and again physics has been found to be expressed in equations possessing the unmistakable character of mathematical beauty, so that pursuit of this beauty has been an actual technique in formulating the theories that the LHC will test. The Universe is rationally beautiful and rewards its explorers with the gift of wonder. Science exploits this fact but it does not explain it. Is it all just our luck, or is it a sign that a divine Mind does indeed lie behind cosmic order?
I believe that science is possible because the Universe is a creation and that we, to use an ancient phrase, are creatures made in the image of our Creator. That’s where God is at the LHC, as the producer of the show.
The Rev Canon John Polkinghorne, KBE, FRS, was Professor of Mathematical Physics at the University of Cambridge
Monday, 12 October 2009
Friday, 2 October 2009
40 Reasons to date a Nigerian man!!!
1. He understands your accent. (Whichever one you speak in)
2. He knows that when you suffix every sentence with 'now', its not a command, e.g. "Come let's go now..."
3. When you guys go out, he pays and doesn't expect a refund of exactly half!
4. He understands why you have to send money home - probably doing the same himself!
5. He doesn't see your kid sister staying in your house as an inconvenience/ cramping his style.
6. He doesn't think you should put your parents in a home.
7. He eats 'Gbegiri and Amala' and doesn't think it's 'yucky' or 'spicy'. In a nutshell, loves your cooking
8. He gets your jokes.
9. The way he licks his ten fingers 'cos that Ogbono soup with Iyan hit da spot, Oh Yes!!!
10. He has got his education or he got something going on.
11. He may be a baby daddy but he loves his kid and takes care of them.
12. He can have a bus load of conversation without him saying much 'cos his momma taught him that.
13. He loves to see you shake that ass to Sir Shina Peters, the original "Back That Ass Up" master.
14. He will settle an argument and say sorry while maintaining his man status.
15. I am IN charge but he is THE charge, we understand that.
16. He knows where he is from. Living in NY does not mean you are from NY.
17. He thinks you're so pretty without makeup.
18. He calls you native endearing names like "Nne" or "Omo"
19. He has respect [not to be confused with obedience) for his elders(important).
20. The way he gets embarrased and says "I beg oh" when you compliment him.
21. The way he says "I love you baby" ? may be very fake yet sounds so TRUE!
22. The way he eats meat with his bare hands? for some reason is sexy.
23. The way he calls you his wife in front of all his friends.
24. The way he says "Shey you get am" when he thinks you are not paying attention, but you really are.
25. The way he knows that it is you calling and answers the phone "Hey Baby!" without looking at the caller ID.
26. The way Naija men look when they are all decked out in native? there is nothing sexier than a dark chocolate man in lace o!
27. Pronounces your name like say na im born you.
28. The way he flows from Ebonics to Pidgin English to Akata with ease.
29. He is just at home at your office picnic as he is at the Naija reunion.
30. The very satisfied look on his face after eating one of your meals and the way he glares at you while picking his teeth with the tooth pick,and you both know that you are his next "meal".
31. He appreciates the art of yanshrolling when he sees one!
32. Keeps you from doing wahala by buying a stickshift vehicle he knows U can't drive!
33. He saves you money on groceries a la "limited diet". Just cook the stew and he'll figure the rest? Eba, Amala, Fufu or even plain old White Bread!
34. No need for breast implants to impress am!
35. No need to go kill himself trying to maintain a six pack. He knows u know big belle is sexy inside Agbada!
36. He knows to allow you like three hours to get ready for a party!
37. He will not complain when you waka with headful of rollers inside house but quick to let you know that aint nothing sexy about that when you want to go outside.
38. Her singing while doing housework is a classic reminder of wetin you dey miss when you dey carry Akata woman!
39. He thinks the small gap between your front teeth are actually sexy!!!!
40. Finally,He's cool just 'cos He Is Just A Naija Man PERIOD!!!
2. He knows that when you suffix every sentence with 'now', its not a command, e.g. "Come let's go now..."
3. When you guys go out, he pays and doesn't expect a refund of exactly half!
4. He understands why you have to send money home - probably doing the same himself!
5. He doesn't see your kid sister staying in your house as an inconvenience/ cramping his style.
6. He doesn't think you should put your parents in a home.
7. He eats 'Gbegiri and Amala' and doesn't think it's 'yucky' or 'spicy'. In a nutshell, loves your cooking
8. He gets your jokes.
9. The way he licks his ten fingers 'cos that Ogbono soup with Iyan hit da spot, Oh Yes!!!
10. He has got his education or he got something going on.
11. He may be a baby daddy but he loves his kid and takes care of them.
12. He can have a bus load of conversation without him saying much 'cos his momma taught him that.
13. He loves to see you shake that ass to Sir Shina Peters, the original "Back That Ass Up" master.
14. He will settle an argument and say sorry while maintaining his man status.
15. I am IN charge but he is THE charge, we understand that.
16. He knows where he is from. Living in NY does not mean you are from NY.
17. He thinks you're so pretty without makeup.
18. He calls you native endearing names like "Nne" or "Omo"
19. He has respect [not to be confused with obedience) for his elders(important).
20. The way he gets embarrased and says "I beg oh" when you compliment him.
21. The way he says "I love you baby" ? may be very fake yet sounds so TRUE!
22. The way he eats meat with his bare hands? for some reason is sexy.
23. The way he calls you his wife in front of all his friends.
24. The way he says "Shey you get am" when he thinks you are not paying attention, but you really are.
25. The way he knows that it is you calling and answers the phone "Hey Baby!" without looking at the caller ID.
26. The way Naija men look when they are all decked out in native? there is nothing sexier than a dark chocolate man in lace o!
27. Pronounces your name like say na im born you.
28. The way he flows from Ebonics to Pidgin English to Akata with ease.
29. He is just at home at your office picnic as he is at the Naija reunion.
30. The very satisfied look on his face after eating one of your meals and the way he glares at you while picking his teeth with the tooth pick,and you both know that you are his next "meal".
31. He appreciates the art of yanshrolling when he sees one!
32. Keeps you from doing wahala by buying a stickshift vehicle he knows U can't drive!
33. He saves you money on groceries a la "limited diet". Just cook the stew and he'll figure the rest? Eba, Amala, Fufu or even plain old White Bread!
34. No need for breast implants to impress am!
35. No need to go kill himself trying to maintain a six pack. He knows u know big belle is sexy inside Agbada!
36. He knows to allow you like three hours to get ready for a party!
37. He will not complain when you waka with headful of rollers inside house but quick to let you know that aint nothing sexy about that when you want to go outside.
38. Her singing while doing housework is a classic reminder of wetin you dey miss when you dey carry Akata woman!
39. He thinks the small gap between your front teeth are actually sexy!!!!
40. Finally,He's cool just 'cos He Is Just A Naija Man PERIOD!!!
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